Friday, June 28, 2024

Dear Diary - I

 Yesterday was aathu's birthday. He was unable to come home. He is in Mumbai. So, me P and Pa wished him at 12 and we had some fun conversation.

Also, his elder brother's wedding anniversary too falls on the same date . Sometimes ,  I wonder whether his father intentionally chose this date to maintain some eternal connection between the brothers.

What happened during that wedding is another story.

I like to wish people irrespective of whether they do the same for me. I always donot forget their birthdays and wedding anniversaries. This has been my habit.

Why all these stories because i got hurt badly yesterday. I donot know whether it was intentional or just akkairai from him(the brother). I wished both manni and anna separately and received the Thank you message immediately from anna also adding that he wish that his brother has a peaceful and healthy birthday.

I learnt later that he wished him early in the morning with simple Happy birthday. But, why this long message for me. I felt may be he is pointing me that he is not peaceful and healthy because of me or he wish i give him all those things or he blames me for those things. All these have been circling my mind yesterday and suddenly i felt i have no one to care or to even share feelings with. 

I strongly wish for my mother at these times and curse god for not giving me a father who doesnt bother about me but happily living with his other family. 

I know all these are thoughts due to periods but sometimes i get so overwhelmed.

IAM ALSO A HUMAN BEING WITH FEELINGS.

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