Weirdo

 Sometimes, i wonder, Am i a weirdo. 

In this current scenario of Prime, Netflix and whatnot, I haven't watched a single series but for one such which had Lakshmi and Madhubala. SWEET , KARAM AND COFFEE. I like lakshmi a lot and when the trailer came i was waiting for the release date and finished the series in one go.

Maybe that anxiety is what stopping me from watching series. I don't have control when it comes to certain things. Like if i start a book, i have to complete it , no matter what. I will read the whole night and be like a zombie the next day. And not to mention i read the last page after few minutes into the book.

Same thing with respect to movies. I see wikipedia for the plot and the story before watching any movie and it always creates a big war in our household. P doesnt like us revealing anything. He will not even allow us to discuss any movie and when i say discussion we are not allowed to even put forth our guesses.

And he wants to watch the movie from the beginning. Beginning means right from the first frame. It so happened when Vikram (the current one ) released, we booked for 1st day early morning show right before his 12th boards. And the previous night we were just discussing about the film. And aathu during the conversation casually mentioned, i think kamal would die in the film. Thats it. All hell broke loose. P started shouting - why did you say - You have spoiled everything - thats why i dont talk to you at all. 

And me being me, simply said - you have crossed your limit and as a punishment we are not going to the movie. Next day i stood my ground and we didnt go at all. 

I know i was being egoistic and stood sparring with him equally but somethings need to be emphasized to the children. Neraiya samayathula they test your patience, Ithu intha chamathu P ya , Kaanbathu kanava allathu nejamma nnu kooda neraiya doubts vanthirukku.

I think thats the thing with modern parenting. You oscillate like thirisangu sorgam between gentle parenting and the need to teach them discipline and manners.

I think by the time Pa comes to teens , thalaiyla oru mudi kooda minjaathunnu nenaikkaren.

I KNOW I ALWAYS START A TOPIC AND MOVE ON TO SOME OTHER THING.

Independence

 I have never been to hill station. Iam serious. Past 2 years only i have been travelling independently.... Though not alone it was very liberating.

Before marriage, always have travelled with uncles / aunts / grandmother. Only once that too for school excursion went to trichy and tanjavur. Even the travelling reduced to nil after my uncles moved from different towns to Chennai when i was 10. Before that went to mostly temples or relatives houses. Never once for sightseeing. 

When my cousins went to Ooty or kodaikkanal or Mysore - It was like a dream. Once my Uncle while returning from sabarimala gave us a choice in Madurai - antha side palani intha side kodaikkanal enga polamnu - Ennoda keragam nnu kovai sarala sonna maathiri - my paatti chose palani. Avvalavuthaan athuvum buuusssss nnu pochu.

Seri after marriage honeymoon polamnu oru periya kanavu - But marriage la iruntha pala kozhapathula neraiya swamikku vendinathaala - romba poruppa went to Thirupathi along with my in-laws - athuve etho oru liberating ah irunthathu. After so many years i travelled.

Then, ore kadamai kannayiram - P happened and paatti at home - so was visiting only temples - short duration. Then for one of our anniversary made plans well in advance and went to Mysore for a quick trip - 2 nights and 3 days. 

Then again Agnayanavasam for 10 long years. Aathu was in Mumbai. After much hesitation and planning and we split ourselves and visited aathu in Mumbai. First P and Pa went to Mumbai with Aathu for 4 days and I was with paatti. Then P stayed as home and I went along with Pa to Mumbai. 

Wow - that was the freedom i was talking about in the first paragraph. Before that i was always accompanied by someone. First time i took Pa and went to Mumbai. It was frightening and at the same time exhilarating. Always i was treated like queen by my aathu. He will take care of everything. Checkin , luggage and everything and the last time was almost a decade ago. So, it was like all the more like first time. Going to the airport, checkin and boarding - ithuve enakku etho saathanai panna maathiri irunthathu.... Enakke enna paatha ore chirippu chirippa vanthathuu.... ithukke ivvalavu scene ah nnu.

I was thinking about my friends who traveled abroad for their UG even. Naano intha 40s la just oru Mumbai kke ivvalavu scene podrene nnu. 

Now my long time aasai fulfill agumnu nenaikkaren. Booked tickets to Madurai and Kodaikanal. Lets keep fingers crossed.

Now searching a good place to stay and for shopping. Google aandavare thunai. Paakkalam wanted to visit thirupparangunram too. P and Pa cooperate pannuvaangala nnu theriyala. ippove no kovil nnu solraanga parpom.

Passion

 Always right from my childhood, i love to teach. Iam so glad i acted upon it not for passion but out of compulsion. Actually i didnt choose CA as an ambition or something rather it was the only cheapest money making course.

So, when we underwent rough patches approx 8 years ago, teaching was the only option i had. As it had its perks. And again aathu was worried about the students cause those days the news was filled with students attacking the teacher and not to leave behind the teacher who eloped with an student (aathukku antha bayam laam illa chumma oru pechukkuthaan) . So he suggested taking classes for lower standards, but me being me changed the advertisement which i was supposed to give in the local newspaper in the last minute and conveniently blamed it on one aunty who accompanied me.

That was the best decision i made. From then on, its been a wonderful journey. Not only i earned but i got to interact with the students on a daily basis. Its so refreshing and boy it does have its moments when parents expect instant results like maggie or the jee boom baa . 

Once again the accounts paper got over and it still gives me high when children come and say happily that they did their exams well. That instant you forget the 8-10 hours which you had put every single day for the past 15 days not to mention the late zoom meetings (thanks to COVID) and the whatsapp doubts.

More than that when they hesitate to leave tearing up but not wanting to show it is the best moment. What more i can ask for. 

I think this is the only profession where you get so happy seeing others children perform i suppose.

It gets more special when the first batch still remember your birthday and bring cakes and when everyone wish you on teachers day.

Iam so much blessed to be surrounded by good people and iam forever thankful to God for guiding me whenever iam in crossroads.